Great job mum! I turned out amazing!

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Slut faming

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Carpe fucking diem

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I know who killed Jenny Schecter.

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Sounds gay. I’m in!

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Old Queen

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gay af

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Home is where them fuckers ain’t

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How hard can it be? Boys do it.

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Lesbihonest, I like you!

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In a world full of idiots, you are my favorite one.

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A wise woman once said ‘Fuck this shit’ and found another job.

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Here’s to an exciting new chapter!

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Love is a terrible thing to hate.

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Fine then… go and be fabulous somewhere else!

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Live, laugh, leave me alone

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Smells like: my own f*cking place

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Fancy Bitch. Congrats on your new home!

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I love you more than you know.

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My favorite child bought me this candle.

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Can’t do epic shit with basic people

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I’m too clumsy to be around fragile masculinity

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Your vagina deserves better

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You go girl!

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proudly difficult

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be a legend!

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We are the best.

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If you sexist me, I will feminist you

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tired mums club

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Resting Witch Face

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It is not your job to make them comfortable

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WITCH VIBES

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real godmothers sparkle

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May orgasms be with you

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I hope your day is as nice as your butt

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Your anxiety is lying to you

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You are my favorite boyfriend

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You are my favorite girlfriend

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Marry me?

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You are my favorite husband

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You are my favorite wife

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5/5 would marry again

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You are the one I text when I am drunk.

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Will you be my valentine?

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Don’t forget to blow me

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Burns slower than your stock assets

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Good. Vibes. Only.

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I lost the game

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Smells like you’re gay

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You’re the best sister

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